-The Five Love Languages, Gary Chapman
I've been thinking about this post for quite some time now. Well, maybe not the post, but I've been thinking about the state of my heart and what it needs lately. I've been thinking about the post because I want to share because hopefully someone out there in this world understands where I'm coming from.
In the realm of love languages, it should be no surprise that I am a "Words of Affirmation" person.
I mean, HELLO, I'm in law school. People who are in law school at some point have to have a love or serious appreciation of words.
Further, I love to read...anything. I read at least 20-30 blog posts, the New York Times, The Daily Mail, People, UsWeekly, my hometown newspaper, and Facebook every morning. Now not all of these are valid sources of information, but it is part of my daily routine. That doesn't include my class assignments, books I'm currently reading or The Twitter.
It might sound silly, but I feel most inspired by what someone has written down on a page. I'm currently re-reading Kelle Hampton's, Bloom and it just makes me want to leap off the couch and do something for others! My bathroom mirror is also covered in quotes that inspire me to push forward in my weight loss journey and law school journey for that matter.
And if you needed any further proof that I'm a words person, the above statement taken from The Five Love Languages book describes me to a "T."
I am blessed because I grew up with a dad and mom who told (and still tell!) me when I looked pretty. They also tell me how proud of me they are. They tell me how much they love me. I realize that this is a huge thing.
My husband tells me consistently that he loves me and is one of my biggest cheerleaders when it comes to just being me in general.
I can also tell you exactly what was said when during lectures I received when I got into trouble growing up as if it happened five minutes ago.
And I can tell you what B last said that hurt my feelings.
It takes me a long time to recover when I have an argument or disagreement with someone just because I can hear their words over and over in my head. I have been known to stew on a heated conversation for six months.
The other problem is that because I'm a lover of words, I also happen to be really good at reading body language.
From a five minute conversation, I can interpret what each person really means and then turn around and re-interpret it three different ways, if I'm having an especially low day. I have a hard time not reading too much into things regularly.
So as much as I love words, they also get me into trouble too.
Know where I struggle the most? SOCIAL. MEDIA.
Yep, that's right. Me, the lover of The Twitter, Blogosphere, and at times, Facebook.
The girl who has talked countless others to get in on the action has a very dirty little secret.
Tuesday, I posted a photo of how far I've come so far on my weight loss journey.
I hesitated before I posted it and I probably should have taken more stock into that hesitation, but I didn't and here we sit.
Before I went to bed, I checked and there were 75 likes and 25 comments on how well I've done and how great I look. I was on cloud nine. I even cried because of all the encouragement I received.
But when I laid down to sleep, Satan creeped in and started his dirty work.
"75 likes. Big Whoop."
"Look who HASN'T liked your status. Friends from school, family members, friends from church. Yeah don't get too excited. It's really not that big of a deal."
I bought it.
I laid awake for twenty minutes stewing about it and yes, obsessively checking Facebook to see if others had liked it any more or commented.
Wanna know the worst part? I had told two different people to tell Satan to get lost not twenty minutes before I went to bed. And yet, here I was struggling myself.
Lately, I've really been struggling with words that others say to me and don't say to me.
And I haven't been struggling with the most important words of all: The Bible. God's Holy Word.
And when I'm not struggling, wrestling, resting in, or reading those words? It shows big time.