Total Loss: 68.2 pounds
Starting Weight: 239 pounds
Current Weight: 170.8
Pounds to goal weight: 20.8
The other thing that really messed with me is my new target number of 26. I don't know why, but seeing that number really messed with my head. I don't struggle with the scale. I see the scale once a week and that's it. But the target point number of 26 messed with me. When I am having solid weight loss each week it is because I give myself grace and allow myself to go over a few points each day, if necessary. I don't beat myself up about it. I see it as a challenge to get rid of it with more running and more cross-training.
But that being said, I knew that this part of the weight loss was going to be a battle for me. I'm getting down to my last pounds and it seems like it would be easier. I've been doing this for over a year now. I know the process, but that is when I think we are (and I am!) at our (my) most vulnerable. I find it analogous to coming forward and speaking up on your beliefs about being a Jesus follower. Every time I speak up, I feel like the next day, sometimes that next hour, I am tempted by Satan to see just how serious I am. This is the time when I have to decide how bad I want it.
How bad do I want to be healthy?
How bad do I want to be in the best shape possible?
How bad do I want to lose the weight?
I don't want y'all to think that I am being hard on myself. I'm not. I just think that it is important that others who are in this fight see that I struggle too. Fattitude is still an issue for me sometimes.
The important thing is because I have been doing this for over a year, I know what I need to do to move forward and take back the loss.
I still have a lot to be proud of, but I still have work to do.
I believe that I was made to be healthy.
I was made to be in the best shape possible.
I believe that I was made to lose this weight.
I was made for more.
What I craved this week: Cokes. Seriously, the craving is still there and while it isn't as bad as it was, it is still there. It translated into other forms of sugar. It is a long hard process to get over these cravings.
What I noticed was different about my body: When I give myself grace aka allow myself to go over my daily point goal by 2-3 points every day, I do much better with my portions and self-control. I don't have an urge to eat everything in sight. I talked about this a bit above. So that is what I am going to do. Again.
Workouts I did this week: One long run, and a walk. The workout department sucked this week because of a hellacious project I had due.
Personal Goal for this week:
- Hit all of my runs.
- Do The Shred 4-5 times.
- Give myself some grace.
- Finish my school projects for this week.
What I’m looking forward to: Losing weight, being done with these projects and Phoenix!!
Frame of Mind: I really hate how I struggle after every milestone. I almost don't want to celebrate it sometimes. I still struggle with wanting to celebrate with food. I think it is somewhat part of the Southern culture.
Someone dies. We eat.
Someone graduates. We eat.
Someone gets married. We eat.
Someone gets good grades. We eat.
Someone gets a job. We eat.
Someone has a bad day. We eat.
Someone sees family. We eat.
Someone hits a weight loss milestone. We eat.
It is a cycle. Now for almost half of those, my choices are better, but some of them are not.
It is still a struggle and the fight continues on!
How did your week go?