"Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift all of you as wheat. But I have prayed for you Simon, that your faith may NOT fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers." - Luke 22:31-32, NIV (emphasis mine)
I've been thinking a lot recently about how I shouldn't feel bad to mark the time that has passed since I handed my first born to a nurse for the last time. I have a friend that wrote a book about the loss of her son.
It really has me thinking about writing my own.
I've read Angie Smith's book and now I've read my friend's, but I want to tell my own story. The biggest thing that I worry about is that people will forget about Lily. I have family now that don't like to ask me about Lily because I still cry when I talk about her. What my family doesn't understand is that I will probably always cry when I talk about her because I miss her. But I NEED people to ask me about her.
Lily was a real person and her story deserves to be told.
Unfortunately, this won't be the last time that someone has a little girl with Trisomy 13 and as terrible as it is to be in this club, people need to know that it can be survived. I need the world to know that a baby that was not wired for this world helped me to come to Jesus. Other mommas need to know that it doesn't sound weird that they know their kids loved a certain band or certain foods even if they never took a breath outside our tummies.
(For the record, Lily was a fan of Queen. She loved mango magic smoothies and hated ranch and salsa. She also was a night owl like her Pappaw and AJ.)
We need friends that will hold our hand when we are still sad and people don't get it.When family members don't know what to say or what it is like to experience this terrible tragedy, I want the momma to be able to hand my book to them and say, this is what it is like for me.
I want her life to mean something. I want Lily to have a legacy. I've been thinking about it a lot as you can tell. This might be the way it happens.
Happy Seven Months Lily. Momma loves you.
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